As from today, I have finally got in my hands the national identity card which certifies I’m now an official Spanish citizen. Why do I say finally? – you might ask yourselves-. Well, I say “finally” because it has taken almost three years of document submitting and bureaucracy to arrive to this moment. And what does this moment mean? – you might also ask yourselves-. Well, it means that I have now got two nationalities: Chilean and Spanish (yes, I can keep both). Does this mean I now have my heart divided between these two countries? It could certainly mean that, but truly I don’t really give a shit about that factor. The important thing to me is that my Spanish nationality opens me a brand new door to move wherever I would like within the European Community (yes, I am now also officially a European Citizen) and that I will not have to worry ever again about renewing residence papers or getting my ass kicked out of this continent. I have spent over a decade in Barcelona (three of those years as an illegal immigrant) and now I can “finally” make a big bonfire with all the pile of papers I’ve been forced to keep and collect over the years, so as to prove that I had earned (with hard work and sweat) my right to remain here. And now, that big pain in the ass is “finally” over…
Anyway, whether you want it or not, having two nationalities makes you think about what you are, where you come from, where you go and all that kind of stuff… Despite having now a Spanish passport too, I know that deep within I’m Chilean and will remain Chilean to the last day of my life. That’s where I spent most of my childhood and university years, and that’s the place where I got formed (or deformed, for all it matters) - even if I’ve also had the luck to spend my teenage years in The States and the last decade of my life here in Spain. But isn’t curious how it works, though? I mean, I’ve been living here for quite a few years now, but yet I’m far from feeling a native (and know I’ll never feel like one), even if I don’t feel like a foreigner either. And the same works for Chile, because I know too that if I ever decided to return there, I’m not going to feel like the same “Chilean” person I was before my departure.
So, where I am going now? Got no much of an idea, but I feel FREE to move and that’s what I like...
I doubt I ever return to Chile to live (even if I know I could have a pretty good, comfy life over there), but I do not feel “tied” to Spain either… Barcelona is a wonderful city, but I feel exploring… And now that I “finally” have the freedom of movement for so long desired I think I’ll have to start thinking seriously about my future objectives…
By the way, I’m most probably going to Rome in two weekends from now…
(I’m on the search…)