The Llama Rider...

After a couple of days off, I should be catching up with all your wonderful posts… But a man is a man… And a man must face his responsibilities…
Double tagged as I find myself in this moment of my blogging existence, I am long overdue for a reply to the “If I could…” list I got involved into by our lovely Peanut Queen and our lively DBdoberman…
General rules are, I quote DB, “From the list of occupations below, select five (5), and write a post on your blog, on how you would perform each, if they were your job. When you are done, add a couple of occupations to the bottom, and ambush five other fellow bloggers to prepare a list”
I subscribe too to another condition DB has added, which I completely agree with: “IF you have already participated, and want out of doing it again, it is up to you find somebody to pass it off to, and it CANNOT be me, not ever again! “… This repeated by me now means you cannot send this back to me, but it certainly does not imply that if you feel like you can go on now and hit DB once again with this wonderful list (he, he, he)…
OK,
I choose as follows,

1) If I were… a Llama Rider… Well, if you saw the pic at the beginning of this post, you pretty much get an idea of what I think… Yes, I would fit my llama with a customized leather jacket, red-yellow blazes painted on the sides, I’d buy her a pack of Marlboro and we would hit the road… The wind hitting our faces while speeding up other fellow hell’s angels with a grin on our faces; the sun always unreachable on the distant horizon; the sweat of our leather jackets running in floods by our bodies; the dumps of my llama lining up behind our backs as a proof of those places we once came from and we might never, ever, see again… We’d pick up plenty of fights and beautiful girls (ocasionally I’d pass my llama through a car-wash service, just to make sure the “beautiful girls” don’t get scared by my llama’s funny smells… My llama would probably try to do the same with me, I guess…)… When in fights, I’d have nothing to fear, for I will know my beast is loyal and whoever thinks a llama is furry, stupid animal, is somehow mistaken… Llamas can kick back as hard as any horse and, on top of that, they can throw hard spit balls with a precision that a sniper would have nothing to envy to (believe me, I’ve been a target of their aim!)… You might think all of this is ridiculous, but it’s not the first time the thought of being a Llama Rider has crossed my head… “Riders on the storm, riders on the storm… Into this world we’re born, into this world we are thrown”… Coming from the desert and the harsh hights of Los Andes, a llama is certainly one of the beasts who knows all about this.
2) If I were… a homeless person… Believe it or not, this one is one I’ve always felt like experiencing and do not feel very anguished by the thought… As a matter of fact, when I was like 4 years old, coming to visit us, my grandma once found me under a bridge close to our house, where I was sitting with a cloth bag tied to a stick, just like a runaway… Of course, she almost panicked when she saw me there… But she always reminds me that I didn’t look the least worried… Ocasionally, I must confess I still feel like hitting the road (no llama this time, he, he…)… And my girlfriend’s sister is almost convinced too I must have been a bump in a previous life due to some particular traits of my character like: I love sleeping on the floor (which I do not do as much as I’d like to, because my girlfriend prefers we use a matress); I could go on and on for days just feeding on bread and water; I love walking LONG distances; I can fall asleep anywhere, no matter the noise; I feel no attachment to material things; I work and earn my living, but I couldn’t care less about money or the lack of it; for me, life is just as beautiful whether you look up or whether you look down; I do not feel the least attracted by many of the so-called “comforts” of life; I’m not the least nostalgic; I don’t give a shit about social classes… Often I think the hardest part about leaving home would be how could you say that to your loved ones without breaking their hearts.
3) If I were… An astronaut… Ok, if I had the chance to get shuttled up all the way up to the stars, I’d love to set my foot on the moon and paint a mega-giant-size mural-like painting that could be seen from any place on earth… it wouldn’t even have to be my own creation… Imagine the moon with a huge Monalisa on one side and Van Gogh’s sunflowers on the other, for example (we could even drag an international voting process to select the masterpiece)… I’d just love to be there and be part of the painters… It’d probably take a long time, but it’s not like I can contribute much to any investigation taking place on the universe, so I might as well just spend all my time painting.
4) If I were… A woman for one day… This is easy. If a woman, I’d be the “femmest” of all femme-fatal ladies… I’ve always thought women have all that’s needed to turn any guy crazy, but many of them just don’t let themselves go as far as they could go and enjoy the fact of “having the force” with them… Of course, I mean femme-fatal in the classy, elegant, dark-dressed, cold blooded kind… I would make men drool and kiss my feet… And by the end of the day, probably I’d wanna be a woman for another day…
5) If I were… a Chef…. Ummm, I got this one sort of thought out already, so basically I’ll be detailing another one of my stupid plans… If I were a Chef, I’d use my prestige and abilities to set up a chain of LOW STANDING restaurants… ??? … What do I mean… I mean I’d make the greatest food on earth at the cheapest prices… Just the contrary of High Standing places… Reason for this, to enjoy food and just to show people what wonderful creations they could try for a reasonable amount and how they usually get cheated and awfully robbed when attending most of the “trendy” and exclusive joints in town.

I’m not sure whom could I tag, or if I can tag five bloggers, who have not done this already, and who could be willing to do it now (my links list is not that long yet…he, he)
Well, for the time being, this are the tagged bloggers:
- Happyandblue2
- Extraordinary Woman in a Mediocre Life (if you happen to be back to blogging)
If I make up my mind about anyone else, I’ll let you know ASAP.

If I could be a scientist...
If I could be a musician...
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect...
If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist...
If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete...
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper...
If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a llama-rider...(by Ogre)
If I could be a bonnie pirate...(By Teach)
If I could be a service member...(By Jeremy)
If I could be a business owner...(By Blue 944)
If I could be an actor... (By Blue 944)
If I could be an agent...(By KelBel)
If I could be video game designer...(By KelBel)
If I could be a comic book artist...(By Stoli)
If I could be a hooker...(By Pollo Loco)
If I could be a crack addict (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a porn star (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a mime (by Garrison)
If I could be a domestic engineer (by Rick)
If I could be a chimney sweep (by laine)
If I could be a masseuse (by laine)
If I could be a taxi driver (by Brian)
If I could be a priest (by Brian)
If I could be a fighter pilot (by Sara)
If I could be a homeless person (by Sara)
If I could be a biker (by Walker)
If I could be a mortician (by Walker)
If I could be a marine biologist (by DB)
If I could be a garbageman (by DB)
If I could be a rich girl...
If I could be a witch...
If I could be a racer...
If I could be an agent...
If I could be video game designer...
If I could be a comic book artist...
If I could be a hooker...
If I could be a homeless person...
If I could be an astronaut...
If I could be a child again...
If I could be invincible...
If I could be a superhero...
If I could be a man/woman for the day...
If I could be a legendary fantasy figure or warrior...
If I could be a vampire...
If I could be an animal...
If I could be a radio talk show host...
If I could be a successful inventor...

MINE
If I could be a moviemaker…
If I could be a miner…
If I could be a hunter…